Friday, May 14, 2010

First try at a villanelle

This is my first attempt at a villanelle. I'm not sure what I think of it.

VILLANELLE
by Hank Kalet

Her mind untroubled by a lack of clarity,
memory decayed, sputtering in a buzz like
radio static that damns a song to obscurity.

She'd leave the house, wander alone in the city
on streets unknown to her brittle, fragmented psyche,
her mind untroubled by a lack of clarity,

echoed noise, nothing approaching lucidity,
a fog of vague images and sound and such, like
radio static that damns the song to obscurity.

muffled tones, a dress she recalls as so pretty
she refused to take it off, thoughts jumbled in time,
her mind untroubled by a lack of clarity,

dense calls to long-dead lovers; I have to pity
the emptiness and cold white noise in her eyes, like
radio static that damns a song to obscurity.

Film reel sputters, flickers, snaps, gets spliced, turns gritty,
frame by frame, leaning into the stuttering light,
her mind troubled by a lack of clarity,
radio static that damns her song to obscurity.

19 comments:

Wayne said...

Do not go gentle into that lack of clarity....

With Charlie, we get to see the noise and distortions acted out routinely. It's a good poem.

嵇ImogeneL_Spielman said...

上來打聲招呼,祝你一切平安!.............................................

俊宏 said...

很用心的blog,推推哦 .............................................

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LorenE_Mese鈺雯 said...

you have a good taste!............................................................

gocod said...

真正的愛心,是照顧好自己的這顆心。......................................................

sdas said...

A liar is not believed when he speaks the truth...................................................

佳皓 said...

It is easier to get than to keep it...................................................................

溫淑芬 said...

Many a little makes a mickle...................................................................

GlenS_Mielke12嘉偉17 said...

生存乃是不斷地在內心與靈魂交戰;寫作是坐著審判自己。......................................................................

熙辰 said...

喜歡你的部落格,留言請您繼續加油.................................................................                           

陳智強 said...

所有的資產,在不被諒解時,都成了負債............................................................

云依恩HFH謝鄭JTR安 said...

向著星球長驅直進的人,反比踟躕在峽路上的人,更容易達到目的。............................................................

芸茂芸茂 said...

這麼好的部落格,以後看不到怎麼辦啊!!..................................................................

吳婷婷 said...

有用的才華若不用,便如同日晷儀放在陰暗之中............................................................

育隆 said...

相逢即是有緣~~留個言問候一聲,祝您平安順利............................................................

盈廖生家秀蔡 said...

開心不開心都是一天,祝您能夠笑著面對一切!............................................................

寧年 said...

一棵樹除非在春天開了花,否則難望在秋天結果。..................................................

佳蓉 said...

Practice makes perfect.............................................................